


Sanity

by MorganaNK



Category: Inspector Lynley - All Media Types, Inspector Lynley Mysteries (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-01
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-12-22 12:58:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11967885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganaNK/pseuds/MorganaNK
Summary: Tommy's POV immediately after the post-'Limbo' drinks that Barbara suggestedInspired by the song 'Breathing' by Lifehouse





	Sanity

**Author's Note:**

> Property of Elizabeth George and the BBC, no copyright infringement intended  
> Lyrics at the top of the page from 'Breathing' by Lifehouse. Again, no copyright infringement intended

_I'm finding my way back to sanity again..._   
_Breathing ~ Lifehouse_

I managed to convince Barbara that I would be fine spending the night on her couch, despite how much I hated it last time. I am grateful that she didn’t argue with me too much because I can’t go back to the flat and I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts, that way madness lies.

It feels right to have her in my life again. The gaping hole inside me that ached non-stop in her absence has been filled by her return. She stabilises me, grounds me, soothes my shattered soul. I know that I shouldn’t have shut her out in the first place, but I was scared. Scared that I would destroy her like I did with Helen. Like I did with Peter. Like I did with my mother. Like I’ve always done. In truth I am still scared, but I can’t go on without her. I know that now.

The fact that we have been able to pick up our friendship as if nothing has changed speaks volumes about the kind of person Barbara is. She could have turned her back on me, and she would have been well within her rights to do so. She could have made me work for her forgiveness; made me jump through endless hoops just for the hell of it. She could have made me pay for everything I put her though. The fact that she didn’t proves she is a better person than I can ever hope to be. 

There’s no quick fix. No miracle cure-all that will silence the guilt in my heart and the voices in my head, but with Barbara by my side to help and guide me, I know that I will get there in the end.


End file.
